My Redemption Marathon

Lindi B

This spring, I surprised myself with a personal best in a redemption marathon.  After DNF'ing in the heat at mile 17.5 of the Boston Marathon, my soul needed another chance to finish a marathon with a positive experience.  Initially, I thought I would wait until August or September (just prior to the 2017 Boston Marathon application deadline); I knew from my own experience at Rehoboth five weeks after the NYC Marathon last year that it was something of a long shot for a revenge marathon to turn out as well as I hoped.  But by the weekend after Boston, I was not sore, appeared to have most of the fitness from my training build up and was itching to give it another try.

A few hours of online searches yielded the May 1, New Jersey Marathon as a good choice. The race had scenic stretches along the ocean, was a few hours from home and still had available entries and places to stay. I was moved by my husband Michael’s willingness to go with me and cheer me on, and his encouragement that I try again. We discussed doing it in low key way, not broadly announcing my plans in advance so that my disappointment would not have to be too public if it didn’t work out.

We settled on race goals together. My primary goal was to finish the marathon feeling strong, with a smile on my face. My second goal was to run a few minutes faster than the 3:45, Boston Marathon qualifying time. I would only try to run a personal best, faster than 3:38, if I was confident that I was accomplishing the first two and not risking melting down or an unhappy ending.

In the time between marathons, I tried to correct the fueling problems that plagued me in Boston. During Boston, my water canteen had blown up from the Nuun tablets I needed for electrolytes on a hot day. I learned that I could solve that problem by filling my water carrier less full. During Boston, I was nauseous for 10 miles. I decided to try to solve it by modestly increasing my gel intake, from four to five gels, after listening to a Runners Connect podcast by a fueling expert who said that nausea was caused by the stomach emptying and blood flow then needing to be rediverted from the muscles to the stomach. I planned and memorized the mile markers where I would refill water, take gels and see my husband. I visualized staying calm through anything that could go wrong, and the last miles being very windy and hard, yet pushing through.

Our trip to the Jersey shore was easy and uneventful. It took only a few minutes to pick up my number at the expo, take a cheesy photo with my remarkably tolerant teenaged daughter Kira, and head for a pre-race dinner. We were pleasantly surprised to be able to get a same day reservation at Piccola Italia, a restaurant with good, homemade pasta and swift service. I was unfortunately too nervous to be able to eat very much. We stayed at Cedars & Beeches, a lovely, Victorian bed and breakfast located a few miles from the finish line and near where the marathon route would pass twice.

Cheesy Expo Photo with My Daughter

The night before the race, I was worried. Not only was I going into the race with a poor track record, but I was worried that I had not been able to adequately rebuild my carb stores after getting food poisoning on the Tuesday night before the marathon. It didn’t help that I had felt too nervous to eat much at dinner time. I did my best to fuel on juice, bananas and whatever my body would accept. When pre-race nerves woke me at 3 am, I downed a sesame bagel with almond butter and a banana. At 4:30 am, I managed another banana and the overnight oatmeal I had brought. I started to relax.

My pre-race experience was almost perfect.  After imprinting the image of my sleeping daughter curled up like a cat in her bed in my mind, I arrived an hour before the 7:30 am start. I managed a wobbly smile to Michael when he dropped me off and wished me luck.  got a little thrill that my predicted finishing time got me a number near the front and elite baggage check. Mercifully, we were allowed to stay warm and use the restrooms inside the Monmouth Track/expo building. I ventured into the cold rain 9 minutes before the start and jogged five minutes to my corral. I stepped across the starting line three and a half minutes after the leaders. I’ve got this, I thought. Cold rain, can do.

The first five miles were hard. My Garmin shut down and refused to give any reading for almost the first mile. I wanted to run conservatively, but the large, 3:40 pace group ahead of me was slower than I wanted to start, so I weaved around them. My body was in flex between feeling too hot in the rain coat I was wearing and feeling grateful for when the wind gusted. I felt some relief after unbuttoning it. I struggled with a sinking feeling of defeat in the fourth mile when I started to feel nauseous. Here it is again. How would I be able to manage it for 21 miles? I took a gel, thinking that trying the frequent fueling strategy advocated by the podcast couldn’t hurt. 7:45, 7:55, 7:58, 8:06.

Almost immediately after taking the gel, I felt better. I settled in with the 3:30 pace group and my music. I decided that I would not look at my watch. I would run however felt comfortable, take a gel every four miles, stop for water as I had planned and enjoy my music. So long as I did not let the 3:40 group pass me and get out of sight, I would accomplish my pre-race goals.  I appreciated the spectators who had come out in the cold rain and smiled at their signs:  “Gu now, brews later.”  “You’re running better than the government” and “Touch here for power.” As planned, I stopped for water at mile 9.8 and got a huge lift from seeing Michael and Kira in the 13th mile.  7:56, 7:51, 7:54, 7:56, 8:10, 7:56, 7:57, 7:48

At around that time, we split from the half marathon runners, who turned in to finish. It was a bit hard to see them go, knowing we were really only getting started. When the pace started to feel hard in the 15th mile, I remembered my goal of finishing with a smile on my face, and let the 3:30 pace group go. I coasted along comfortably and happily until my next planned water stop at mile 17, where I tried to make a brief bathroom stop to relieve my full bladder. Ugggh!  Both portapotties were full and did not vacate.  I soldiered on. 7:55, 8:11, 8:14, 8:15, 8:37

Despite some physical discomfort, I started to feel much better when I got to mile 18, past the point where I had dropped out of the Boston Marathon and Rehoboth the prior December. I felt strong. “Nine more miles,” I told myself. “Let’s do it.” Miles 19-21 were mostly along the boardwalk. The winds were gusty, and the surface harder to run on than the road, but I kept thinking that running through it was an amazing, spiritual experience.  This is why I run! I decided that small, scenic marathons were the best for me. My body greedily and gratefully accepted my fifth gel. 8:35, 8:28, 8:25

When the course turned inland, I felt my form starting to degrade, but decisively put one foot in front of the other. I thought of the water stop planned at mile 23 and seeing my husband and daughter again just before mile 25. The 3:35 pace group caught up with me at the mile 23 water stop. A peek at my watch showed my heart rate plodding along at 166. My muscles were getting tired, but I had no excuse not to stay with them and dog it too much. I took a final, sixth gel and felt better. My heart soared when I saw my husband and daughter, telling me that I looked strong and cheering me on. I turned onto the final leg of the race along the ocean. 8:27, 8:14, 8:13

On the homestretch, I realized that I would meet my goals: finish with a smile on my face, BQ, plus get a healthy PR to boot. I choked back tears of joy and gratitude. My music play list cycled to a spiritual song, “Here I am to Worship,” and a flock of geese flew overhead in a perfect “V.”  8:11, 8:13

A few moments later, I saw the finish line ahead. I picked up the pace and couldn’t stop smiling.

I crossed the finish line in 3:34:33. A healthy PR, and 11th in my age group.

I was redeemed.

A few minutes later, I was thrilled to see fellow NY Flyers Nick B, Denise I, and Dana M at the finish line. These connections with wonderful people are also why I run. 

-Lindi B