Can the Ranting Runner Recant the Rant?

It’s a New Year and even the Ranting Runner can turn over a new leaf, right?  Glorify the good instead of recounting the wrongs?  Indeed, it would be hard not to when recalling the nearly* flawless New York Flyers 21st Annual Awards Gala held on Saturday. 

It was, in short, a wonderful party, filled – as a marathon is long – with inspiration. Herewith, in no particular order, the highlights of the evening, according to the Ranting Runner.  (If it’s objectivity you’re looking for, please see the main Flyers website for a comprehensive recap and complete list of winners.)

    •    Walking through Battery Park to get to the venue - Much cooler and quieter than in August, when it serves as a post-NYC Half-Marathon rallying point, and bereft of the corresponding crowds, the park was a snowy and solemn prelude to the evening’s excitement.

    •    Memories - As it does every year, Saturday’s Year in Pictures slideshow reminded us why we get up before dawn and go out in the rain or the snow or the oppressive heat, or face whatever it is we have to face in order to keep at it and be able to call ourselves runners.  Who can fail to be moved by those skillfully taken and expertly edited photos that managed to capture the fun and the glory of what we do?  (And the inspirational “We Are the Champions” and “Chariots of Fire” soundtrack didn’t hurt.)  Ranting Runner, for one, was grateful for the scrap of tissue in her pocket.

     •    Meeting new Flyers (and Flyer guests) – The Awards Gala celebrates the Flyers at their finest.  And what better opportunity to greet rookie members and recruit new ones, especially if a trip to the bar puts you face-to-face with some unknown faces?  Who knew just waiting for a cosmo could be so much fun?

 
    •    Meeting the Flyers we already know – As winners were announced and their achievements praised, we learned more than some of us might have known about those first-class people we are proud to call our teammates.  That in addition to being a speedy runner, prolific race photographer, and smiliest person you may ever meet, for example, “Marathoner of the Year” and outgoing club vice-president Brian H. works as a coach for NYRR’s Team for Kids.  Or that expert emcees Deb Meyer and Pat Duffy are such a dynamic duo, worthy of stepping in for Billy Crystal or Whoopi Goldberg to host that other popular awards program.

    •    Seeing newlyweds Dorian D’Angelo and Richard Brounstein – merely the latest in a long line of Flyer pairings.  (The club is a veritable lovefest – at last count, over two dozen couples are known to have met and married through the NY Flyers.)

    •    Watching the Staten Island Ferry go by during a quick outdoor break from dancing - Its sparkling lights reflecting off the water were like a floating fireworks display and reminded one of the early-morning ferry rides to the Staten Island Half Marathon, where runners outnumber bemused non-running passengers 9 to 1.

    •    Seeing recently-exiled Blogmaster, Eric S. - He endured a breakdown-filled, several hundred mile bus ride from his native Canada to spend Saturday evening with us, for which we are very grateful.  Hopefully his receipt of the “Unsung Hero” Award for his hard work in, among other things, bringing us this thoughtful blog, will console him on his journey home.  At the very least, he may be able to use the plaque as a pillow. (Blogmaster's note: Alas, I tried and was unsuccessful.)

    •    The Venue – With its view of the harbor and the Statue of Liberty watching over us in the distance, our party spot was the perfect place to stop and remember that we are, after all, the New York Flyers, who call the greatest city in the world our home. Or at least, our training ground.

And with that, Ranting Runner bids everyone a spectacular running year.  May your PRs be plentiful and may your triumphant faces grace next year’s slideshow. -R.R.

* I would not be the Ranting Runner if I failed to suggest that the people talking loudly in the back of the room during the awards presentation, who made it tough for our hard-working emcees to be heard over their selfish din, should be flogged with dirty running tights for their inconsiderate behavior. Publicly. Preferably in a town square or somewhere else where we can watch and taunt them.

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Running Etiquette, Part 1

(Or Possibly The Most Disgusting Blog Entry You’ve Read Recently)

Snot-rocket! There – I’ve said it. That’s why I joined a running club, in fact: so I could discuss bodily functions and conditions such as digestive ills, blisters, and chafing in strange places, with relative impunity. Or at least without feeling like a freak. Too much. But just because we runners let it all hang out in discussion doesn’t mean we shouldn’t keep things buttoned up a bit where etiquette’s concerned. I’m serious. Keep a lid on it, please. Or at least a Kleenex®. Observe: Runner Number 1 turns to empty his sinuses sans tissue. Or hand. You know: the aforementioned snot-rocket. Hapless Runner Number 2, just downwind, looks up, mouth wide open as he gasps for air... I’ll stop there. Not only is this just plain vile, but depending on wind, ambient temperature, viscosity, etc., could actually be dangerous. (Don’t even get me started on bacteria and viruses and the indignity of having to stop to wipe a stranger’s effluvium off your sunglasses. Or worse – out of your eyes.) Look before you snort, is all I’m saying. (Personally, I’d prefer if you’d hide behind a tree as well, though I suppose I’m in the minority on that point.)

Speaking of behind a tree, consider the forest your phone booth when nature calls. Or some shrubs, at least. Not a bridge railing, or the curb, or somewhere else that leaves you exposed to any passer-by with the misfortune of glancing your way just as you drop your pants. Or worse. And that’s only if a “proper” receptacle (portable toilet, public restroom, bathroom of a well-meaning but naive spectator) cannot reasonably be found.

Now let’s go back in time a bit, to before you’ve drunk the water or energy beverage or pre-race pilsener that made you need that tree to begin with. In the immortal words of the legendary Ed A. – “It’s a water station, people; not a water stop.” So act like a car and think gas station: signal your intent to grab race refreshment and slow down and look before merging – carefully – towards the outside lane. But don’t stop there: grab a cup – really, any cup will do – and keep moving until you’ve either drunk your water or found a place to stop on the side of the course and away from the flow of traffic. Don’t. Just. Stop.
O.K., we’ve covered intake and output, though not in that order. That should do for now. Let’s revisit running etiquette again next time – I promise to keep the gross-factor to a minimum if you leave us a comment with your biggest running etiquette question or complaint.

In the meantime, won’t you please settle a dispute for me? I stopped to use a public water fountain during a run last week but decided to continue without relieving my thirst after seeing a runner ahead of me rinse out her mouth and spit water back into the fountain. I thought that was repulsive and almost confronted her for what seemed like such a blatant breach of sports etiquette. I came home thirsty and ranting and was shocked – shocked! – to hear my husband say he does that all the time. What say you, dear Flyer blog buffs: take a step or two away and spit discreetly into the grass, or treat the public water fountain like your own personal dentist’s sink so that anyone unlucky enough to get there after you is forced to share your germs and watch your mucous spinning around and clogging up the drain?
Please do let me know! - The Ranting Runner

(Ed. note: Can you blame her for wanting to remain anonymous? All I asked for was a little Miss Manners and this is what I got... Be glad I added very few links, and chose images very conservatively.)

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